#3 - Find a Cheer Squad #confidentyou - Response Series

 Challenge #3 - Find a Cheer Squad
 http://www.sugercoatit.com/day-3-find-a-cheer-squad-confidentyou/

Suger says and I quote:

"Find people who love you. Or think you’re ok at least. And tell them of your mission for more confidence. This alone will take something. Telling people that you are working on your confidence takes admitting that it needs work. I’d always been quiet good at putting on a brave front. A plastered face of confidence that people rarely saw through but the truth was that I was terrified, panicking and sick." -sugercoatit.com

Truer words were never spoken. 
I have always been very very good at putting on the brave face, smiling and putting on the show. The song and dance is always the same, my cheery disposition and ridiculous nature are what people have come to expect. So sometimes even when I'm not feeling so cheery, I put on that show. But deep down, under the surface, I am afraid, and feeling awkward, and at times even a little depressed. I can't make conversation without stumbling over my words. Encountering another human being at a time like this is daunting, and brings on anxiety. The onset of these feelings is brief and fleeting, it's rare. Thankfully it never lasts for more than a month or so. The problem lies in the fact that it happens at all, that sometimes, for a month or longer I feel anxious,
socially awkward,frustrated,sad,down,blue,shy,ugly,overwhelmed... the list could go on. Why? Why does it happen?
The problem is that it does, and I don't always know why. 

This is where the cheer squad comes in, a group of people that you know you can count on, you can talk to, people you can turn to no matter what, the people that take you for you and embrace you whole heartedly. These people are the net that you fall in to. I am very fortunate to have many people I can turn to in times of need. My family is a close knit and endlessly loving and supportive one. I am blessed with an amazing extended family and friends who are family. I have a close circle of friends, each one I share a unique bond with, and I know I can talk to any of them at the drop of a pin. For me it's all in learning to talk, learning to tell the people I love that I need to work on me. It's very hard to admit when I'm a mess. 

It's even harder to tell someone else I'm a mess. 

So from here, my mission is to talk, to tell those near and dear to me when I'm not feeling 100% myself, to reach out for love and support when I need it. Because we are not alone in this. I need some work, I need confidence and sometimes I need some one to stand by me, and hold my hand.

Who do you turn to? 

Who is your cheer squad?

Are you honest with yourself and others when things aren't as they should be? 

#2 - You Are Here - Take the Quiz #confidentyou - Response Series

Good Evening ladies and gentleman. 

It's that time again. Post #2 in my response series to the #confidentyou challenge at http://www.sugercoatit.com/day-2-you-are-here-confidentyou/

The challenge is a quiz (one of many),taking inventory of your self confidence, or as Suger puts it, a map of you,this is the red dot that states "you are here" So here it goes.. 

Confident You - Start Up Quiz 

1. On a scale of one to ten, when you are with family/friends how confident would you say you are?  

10 - I feel I am at my best when I am around those I love. 

2. On a scale of one to ten, when you are at work {or in a similar group situation} how confident would you say you are?

7-8 - I often feel overwhelmed, and awkward at work, often times I even feel as though I am just floating, trying to get somewhere.

3. On a scale of one to ten, when you are with strangers how confident would you say you feel?

5 - I'm quite shy. 

4. On a scale of one to ten how confident would you say you are, in general?

7 - I like myself, love even, and most of the time I feel pretty good about myself and who I am. 

5. On a scale of one to ten, how confident would other people say you are?

8 - I put on a good show most days

6. What rocks about you?

- My sense of humor

- My curves 

- My love of life and people

- My outlook on life

7. What sucks about you?

- My constant need to do for,fix and take care of others sometimes takes away from taking care of me. 

- I have a level of guilt about things that is at times ridiculous

- My inability as of late to stay on the "wagon"

- I procrastinate.

8. On a scale of one to ten, how happy with YOURSELF are you right now? 

6 - I love myself, and I am happy in my own skin, but lately I have been feeling less than fabulous about my physical self, and that brings my emotional self down a notch too.

9. On a scale of one to ten, how happy are you with YOUR LIFE right now?

8 - Life is good, happy, content and generally pretty awesome.

10. Why are you reading the Confident You series? What do you hope to get out of it? 

I am reading the series and responding to it, because it speaks to me, it speaks to where I am right now and gives me hope for where I want to be. I am a woman in need of a little confidence boost and this series is just what I was looking for. 

I hope to push my confidence to it's limits, and feel better about myself and my life than ever before. 

So that's that. The quiz and me, in a nutshell. 

Take it for yourself and see where you are on the map. 

For me it looks like there is room for improvement. 

Photos, Tidbits and Short Short Stories

I made promises of light and funny, easy to digest posts. Here is one. 

3 weeks ago - Paul and I were headed to Video Games Live, a show put on by the Calgary Philharmonic Orchestra chock full of fun and nostalgic video game music. On the way we stopped for food, at the most amazing little place called: The Salad Bar, on 14th Street and Northmount Drive? I think.. They make amazing and all organic, natural and entirely "home made" dishes. Some of the best food in the city in my opinion. Paul had the GIANT, and I mean giant Portobello Burger at the bottom, huge slices of Portobello mushroom make the burger, then peppers and cheese and everything nice on a massive bun. 

I had the Giant Prawns - Cajun, amazing and just a little spicy with a garlic toast base that is soaked in sauce. Om nom.

On the side we tried the Cucumber Dill Salad, and the Greek Salad, both awesome.

\

Lastly, some of the beauty that is a Canadian winter, I love you pretty snow lined trees. 

That's all for now. All my love. 

Goodnight!

#1 - Be Kind #ConfidentYou - Response Series

Hello Friends,
Here's the first post in response to Suger's "Confident You" challenge http://www.sugercoatit.com/category/confident-you/

Day # 1 - Be Kind 
Challenge: Make a reminder to be kind to yourself.
 http://www.sugercoatit.com/day-1-be-kind-confidentyou/

Suger challenges us to be kind, to ourselves. To embrace the way we are and the way we feel right now. To speak kindly to ourselves, and to take the advice we give others. Remind yourself to be kind. 

Today I am going to start by owning up to the fact that I am exhausted, emotionally and physically, yes, I am embracing that whole heartedly. 
I make it a point to tell myself and others exactly how I am feeling, sometimes to my own detriment. I believe in being honest, no matter how ugly that honesty might be. I have been less than kind to myself lately, putting extra stress on things I feel I have failed at giving my full attention. Mind and body come to mind here, I know deep down that I need a good nights sleep, good food and a really GREAT workout every day to keep my world balanced. It's just how I'm made,and when I get those things I am a happier brighter Erin. So where does the let down happen? How do I fall behind? Because I have forgotten to be kind to myself. I get so caught up in everything else, work, life, a social life, friends, family, and the daily to do's. I often leave myself last on that list. Hanging stress and pressure over my own head has done me no good, the guilt is just tireless. I am going to strive to be kinder to myself, to go back to journalling and healthy eating, to earlier bed times and workouts. To the land of a calmer happier me. 
I am going to take time after work to breathe, to relax, and read, or paint, or just sit and meditate. I am going to be mindful of how I speak to myself and of myself. Afterall, picking yourself apart only hurts you in the end. No one else can do these things for me. 
I am going to remember that it is okay to feel the way that I do when I do and to embrace it for what it is and move on. 

I am also going to give myself little rewards, for a week where I have been nothing but kind to myself. I am going to go see a movie, go for ice cream (in the snow yes), blast some of my favorite music, take a walk, go out with a friend, just celebrate all the ways that we can be kind to ourselves... however I see fit. 

How are you kind to yourself?
What makes for a happier you?
What are you going to do to remind yourself?

How's Your Self Confidence Feeling Today?

Self Confidence

The very definition of which is:

self-con·fi·dence

   [self-kon-fi-duhns, self-]

noun

1.

realistic confidence in one's own judgment, ability, power,etc.

2.

excessive or inflated confidence in one's own judgment,ability, 

etc.

(Dictionary.com)

or as Wikipedia so aptly states:

The socio-psychological concept of self-confidence relates to self-assuredness in one's personal judgment, ability, power, etc., sometimes manifested excessively.^[1] Being confident in yourself is infectious if you present yourself well, others will want to follow in your foot steps towards success.^[2]

My thoughts:

Self Confidence is attained and sustained ideally by positive means, it is valuing ones self.  

Self Confidence is something that cannot be measured,examined or checked by a medical doctor. 

Self Confidence is the sum of so many of our emotional and mental parts. 

Self Confidence should be defined by ones "Self". 

Self Confidence is made up of our emotions and

feelings,thoughts,impressions,opinions,experiences,body image,mental state,physical state and so much more. 

So tell me, how's your Self Confidence lately?

Be Honest. 

If I am being completely up front and brutally honest with myself, and I intend to be. I will have to admit.. my self confidence is shaken. Life creeps up on you, when everything seems happy and rose coloured and takes little pieces of that confidence, if you let it.

So you roll with the punches for some time, and take things with a smile on your face, until you wake up feeling a little less than happy and realize you can't look yourself in the mirror without 

wincing. Life has taken me by storm, as I have said recently. 

I find myself falling off the health and wellness wagon almost daily, my weight is creeping up on me, stress comes in and out. I've lost touch with myself, and I am feeling the aftershocks. 

I am consumed with confusion, emotionally feeling quite literally drained and life is just a plain mess. So how do I clean up the mess, sort myself out again and find my feet? 

How do you regain that confidence when all seems lost and you cannot face yourself? 

Well, a blogger in Australia has answered this question for me. 

Her name is Melissa and she is the fabulous writer, blogging goddess and head liner for http://www.sugercoatit.com/

Her page is full of inspiration, fashion, health, advice and just

plain beautiful life! I definitely recommend you check her out! 

This month she started a blog series called "28 Days to a MORE Confident You" or #ConfidentYou. Every day for 28 days she posts about confidence, tips, tricks and positive ways to boost yours. There is a challenge piece as well, challenging you to do the same, turn your world upside down, a 360 on your own confidence. 

I am hooked. I am subscribed and receive her newsletters,and sometimes admittedly..do an excited little dance when she's updated. I love to read, what can I say? and she is a wealth of awesome!

Here's where I come in. In her introductory post to the "Confident You" series, she challenged her readers to follow along, and become a part of this movement (I don't know what else to call it, it's just that brilliant) She stated and I quote: 

"Every morning from now until the 28th you will have a morning post {6am Australian Eastern Standard Time} with a daily challenge to improve your confidence. I hope you’ll do the challenge and share your successes and your failures with us. You can share your experience in the comments section of each post. You can blog about it {there’s a button below}, share on Twitter or Instagram using the #ConfidentYou hash tag OR on ourFacebook wall. However you want to join in is just fine by me. We’ll have ourselves a little Confident You community." sugercoatit.com 

Here I am. Beyond thrilled to jump in.

I am as always the master procrastinator, and I am 13 days behind the challenge. Behind or not, I'm in. I will post in response to the challenges posed by Suger Coat It, 2-3 challenges per post until I've posted about all 28 challenges. You will likely want to follow her post series to attempt to make sense of mine.

http://www.sugercoatit.com/tomorrow-it-begins-confidentyou/

Hooray for blogs! 

For those of you not interested in intensive reading, I'll try and post something light and funny in between, perhaps some doodles from my sketchbook? 

Until then stay tuned... 

Because in 5 minutes or so I'll post about the first two challenges.

Love,

Erin 

" Self Confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings"